Shift

where am i?
what am i doing here?
tell me why
explain how i feel
tell me what i am doing
tell me what i am here for
don't refer to my past
i do not care anymore
something presses against my face
what it is i do not know
you whispered in my ear
just let the wind blow
i dont care just let me know
when the wind will let me go




JC

Moving On

moving on is the hardest part
walking away with a broken heart
dont know where im going, but i want to go back
because when im not in love its love i lack
reasons of doubt run through my mind
it seems that i just spent way to much time
with my heart hanging low, i just carry on
knowing that someday i will regret her being gone
uninterest killed my passion
along with lack of words, lack of action
sweet surrender, caught me once more
now i look for a new open door
moving on is the hardest part
it feels like im leaving behind a broken heart
i dont know where shes going, i would love to ask
because when im not with her its love i lack
walk the line and walk the plank
into the waters in which many have sank
no chance continuing, so i carry on
knowing that someday i will regret her being gone
i spread my wings even though i dont want to
i spread my wings, just like when i told you
i stuck around, but look where ive gotten
right back where i was, with a heart forgotten





JC

Sun's Redemption

and the sun rises
the sun rises upon the sky
another day comes flying by
trees are empty
all is quiet
heart is roaring with a gentle riot
the sky is grey
but its becoming blue
dim sunshine is showing through
time slowsn down
lost thoughts reappear
life becomes just a simple mirror
all that can be seen
is no more than my own reflection
everything seen is gods blessing
the sun rises upon the sky
another day moves in
just one more chance to start the life,
the life you always wanted to begin

the sun sets
the sun sets before my eyes
as another day went flying by
my eyes are heavy
the air is thin
heart still beating just how its been
the sky is painted
with a stampede of pigments
blowing my mind in an instance
time just stops
and waits for life to catch up
but stopping forever wouldnt even be enough
all that has happened
through my entire life
is silenced by the dimming light
the sun sets before my eyes
another day is gone
but new hope comes tomorrow,
hope comes with the crack of dawn




JC

A Flower's Beginning

Welcome to the world of revulsion
There is no way in, there is no way out
Welcome to the flipside of my mentality
It’s the distance between dreams and reality

Welcome to the world of plunder
There is no way to avoid it
Welcome to where this era ends
Love is forgotten and turmoil wins

Welcome to where two spirits collide
There is no instance of enjoyment
Welcome to the edge of creation
Humans are gone at the start of mutation

Welcome to the second resurrection
Jesus emerges his image to those who can see
Welcome to the world where the blind are majority
Since the human race can not get along its now minority

Welcome to a flowers beginning
See its buds blossom into something vast
Welcome to the bouquet that the world has become
Once its stripped of a flower the growth is done

Welcome to the world of love
Nothing can go wrong but the world it self
Welcome to sufferings conclusion
When all suffering arises to be is an illusion

Welcome to the world that is mine
It is dark enough to see the stars
Welcome to the world that is mine
I say its dark but reality declares me blind



JC

Darkness Falls

the sky gets grey
to match my soul
darkness falls
air gets cold
out i come
from the shadows
in to space
occupied by gallows
mind is blank
face is strait
i wouldnt be here
if i wasnt late
the world watches
all eyes on me
time slows down
to catch the scene
memories of death
memories of evil
makes me angry
makes me feeble
weakened by stress
stressed by the pain
everyone loses
in this disgruntled game
i close my eyes
nothing to change
darkness falls
like a curtain on stage
here i am
looking at closed doors
darkness falls
my mind is yours






JC

Hello Tomorrow

amen to another long day
look ahead and see another on its way
nothing but fear rushes to my brain
fear of losing you just driving me insane
ive been through so much change i dont no what to do
im looking at life through a totally new view
no more activity, no more trouble anymore
i dont no what im doing here anymore
im holding on to an invisible figure
i watch it disappear as my problems get bigger
nothing more do i want but to hold what i got tightly
but i restrain my feelings in fear that it will fight me
failure is really the biggest fear i with-hold
its shrivling my life up turning my big heart cold
failure is the thing that stops me from going
failure is everything that keeps you from knowing
i just want to overcome this rolling stone
i dont know if i can do it on my own
sweet surrenders have failed for me from the start
my mind keeps telling me failure is a broken heart
theres times in this journy when giving up takes over me
it takes away everything that i want to be
ive spent my whole life looking for second chances
i didnt realize that you were looking for answers
answers i have and i keep them deep down
some are hidden in my fear and cant be found
u ask for time but its really me
its all been my responsibility
ive failed once again to overcome myself
so amen to everything i ever felt
start off fresh and whipe the dust of my empty heart
crack it open and let it have a brand new start
i got the same hopes and dreams that i had
but theres still one thing that i dont have
amen to another long day
hello tomorrow, im on my way





JC

World Made of Wall

see nothing but a blank wall infront of me
its up to me to make that wall what i want it to be
i could make it into a fantasy land
or a ballpark view from a grandstand
but if i do nothing, the wall will be a graveyard for all my dreams

ive been wounded and my heart has split in two
caught in the headlights not knowing what to do
i could stand here and take the fall
or i could run away, run away from it all
but running away would mean running away from you

seeing nothing to my left or to my right
no friends to back me, or take my side
when the stronghold crumbles down
i will go with it to the ground
ending my sore painful life

look in the mirror, look into your eyes
ask them if they care to cry
while you are watching them
you tear up and cry again
dont let your heart and mind colide

follow the road that is best for you
dont let me sway what you want to do
whether it leads to love or not
keep your life cuz its all you got
i just dont want your heart to split in two

i see nothing but a blank wall infront of me
its up to me to make the wall what i want it to be
i could make it into a fantasy land
i ballpark view from a grandstand
but if i do nothing, it will be a graveyard of my dreams





JC

Two Thirty Thinking

so quiet, yet can be heard through the silence
so invisible, yet it can be seen by the blindest

so dead, yet spirits run rapid through the soul
so alive, yet a life is nothing if u dont do what your told

so fearless, yet fear follows you around
so tearless, yet in your own tears you drown

so adorable, yet no confidence is gained
so ugly, bcuz the beauty isnt seen through the pain

so in love, yet there is no exact definition to it
so broken, id tell you the definition if i knew it

so depressed, yet the smile seems to hide it
so in love, yet it seems that time just guides it

so messed up, head just keeps spinning around
so strait, yet these footsteps cant find the ground

so quiet, no one thinks that they can be heard out loud
so invisible, yet they are visible to the whole crowd

lifes nothing but a guessing game
u go from among the fire to out in the rain
u go from living in love to living in pain
u go from living in wealth to living in shame
life is nothing but unfair
what u think is missing happens to be right there
ppl say that they dont know where love is, but its right in their stare
watching this happen is just to much to bear
i find my self asking what am i doing here
i ask for a sign and all i get a a broken mirror
another challenge i recieve is just another fear
i carry my cross acting as the worlds tear

i find myself looking at the moon and just wishing
that the moon i am talking to is someone listening
i need someone to hear what i have to say
i need someone to help me get through every day
my lifes a struggle and thats the honest truth
my hopes of winning are smshed by what i lose
im left with one person and he speaks to me by way of signs
he messes with my body, he messes with my mind
every struggle i have is something i put apon me
i ask for everything i take, so plz dont wrong me
find me lord in this invisible quiet place
find me lord, show me your face..




JC

Brand New Dawn

i dare you to be the one
to put that bullet in my brain
force my surrender to my pain
close the life that i built in this untruthful game
watching my bridges burn in the filthy flame

launch it all to worthlessness
someone stop me from doing this
inspired by a butterfly kiss
its become something I cant live with
look in my face look through my soul
watch my life spiral out of control
watch me make a fuming fool
living my own life under my own rule
what is a life when u are not restricted
a life of destruction with an unknown infliction
living outside the lines and Gods jurisdiction
let it be up to me to make it reality or fiction
I cant see the line that so many others have drawn
i wake up every morning to a brand new dawn
I ask myself what Is going on;
Saying this time 2morro I will be gone
But there I was again at today’s first light
Sitting up seeing the sun so bright
Under my breath thanking god for my life
But outside of it all I curse it in fright
Denial that I am what I am is why im crazy
Please do all u can so that maybe you can change me
Everything I do can only further fade me
Only you yourself has the power to rearrange me

So I dare you, I am calling you out
Be that person to put that bullet through my brain
Save me the effort and save me the pain
Get me out of this undefeatable game
Or give me a brand new dawn to claim…










JC

Dependant Dream

love goes back to far for me
to understand it, completely
there just is never enough time
to understand, and make up my mind
falling a part and falling to sleep
is the same thing, as a broken dream
no more tears, no more tears for me
when i cry to hard, i just cant see
see what the world has offered me
see what i can do, to make it how i want to be

when im alone i feel so horrid
but when im with you, i find away to ignore it
when im alone i dont want to speak
bcuz every word, is a tear off the cheak
lonely times with my lonely soul
its so empty, but i wish it was full
nothing now can take my past away
so i try hard, to not screw up today
when im alone i just want to turn back
back to where i was, in my healthy past
but when i go there it just makes it worse
it seems everywhere i go, im followed by a herse

in my dreams there is nothing but darkness
when i wake up, i have nothing to accomplish
its like im walking through my life blind
groping around, looking for someone to find
someone to grant all my hopes and wishes
and to mend my heart, with a thousand stiches
in due time i will catch a break
in due time, from this dream i will not wake
darkness will be all i no
and ill be trapped in, this empty soul
love goes back way to far for me
to understand it, completely
i find my self looking for time
bcuz there just aint enough, to make up my mind
im falling apart and im falling asleep
looking for love, in that endless dream
through the darkness i search for light
i search for love, to brighten my life...






JC

Flower

i watch a flower bloom
it sings me to sleep
takes me to where ive never been
takes me to what i seek
i watch a flower bloom
i watch it grow so big
comes to me with the light of noon
gives me a life to live
i watch a flower bloom
but it all hits me in the eye
if i watched it bloom
i am going to have to watch it die
i watch a flower die
nothing to sing me to sleep
what am i?
if i have nothing to guide me to what i seek





JC

Nightmare Inside

reveries smashed into to peices
they lay broken in my wits
restain my angry thoughts on leashes
leashes clenched in my fist
reveries lost in my soul
never to return once more
detestation drowns my notion
dowse my antagonistic roar
dreams of affectionate love stories
dreams of shameful hypocrites
dreams of endless glories
dreams of everything i struggle with
nightmare inside

wakeup alone in my cradle
eyes lining my walls
hoping that this reverie is a fable
or atleast stockades fall
throbbing pain circles imagination
causing my eyes to lock up
raping my mind through forniaction
persuading me that my eyes are not shut
reveries are now blistered into my soul
never to return once more
detestation drowns my notion
dowse my antagonistic roar
still my thoughts conquer my intellect
no broken reverie can keep me restrained
my life wont be a victim of theft
only i can keep myself contained

im a nightmare inside
i need brought in from the rain
im a nighmare inside
even though all reveries have been slain
im a nightmare inside
no words can make me well
im a nightmare inside
with no cure to let me outa this hell
nightmare inside




JC